My fantasy would be for Congress to arrange an "extraordinary rendition" for the chimp and uncle dickhead, to a friendly Middle Eastern country, where they'd start the questioning with gentle taps with electrical cables on the soles of our boys' bare feet.
Sort of a combination interrogation and lesson time for the two tough guys.
I'd feel really bad though, if it progressed to electrodes on the nuts or cattle probes in the anal pores. That would be a real shame!
http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2006/12/23/probes_of_bush_policies_in_works/
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