Wednesday, January 31, 2007

A Real Texan Died This Evening

Molly Ivins died at 5:30 pm Central time today. This is a link to her last column.

For as long as I live I will never understand why kind caring people like Molly have to get a horrific disease while flaming assholes like Bush, Cheney, Fang Rice, Rumsfeld, Bill O'Lielly, Rush Limbaugh, Senator James Inhofe, Ann Coultergeist and other lower life forms always come out unscathed.

Its just not fair and proves beyond any doubt in my mind that there is no "god". Were there, he/she/it would have given cancer to the assholes and let Molly keep on keeping on.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Begging Congress for Impeachment

This letter was just sent to my Congressman Jim Moran (D-VA) through his office website. Its time for the Congress to get off its collegial ass and impeach this bastard.

Dear Congressman Moran

Just how much more dictatorial power is the Congress going to let Bush have before you impeach him? Check out this story from the New York Times for example.

It was a good strategy before the election for Nancy Pelosi to say that impeaching the chimp was not on the table. However since the new Congress has assembled, I think there has been more than enough in the media and elsewhere to provide political cover for bringing articles of impeachment against him. What on earth more does Congress want in the form of evidence?

Bill Clinton was impeached because he lied about a sloppy blowjob. That was it. Bush on the other hand lied about weapons of mass destruction that has resulted in the death of nearly 3100 American kids, maiming of more than 20,000 American kids and the killing of 600,000 Iraqis. Is that not a high crime or misdemeanor? He authorized the release of classified information. Is that not a high crime or misdemeanor? What about abuse of prisoners? Blowing off the Geneva Conventions. Is that not a high crime or misdemeanor? If none of those examples is a high crime, how on earth could a blowjob on a blue dress be one?

If you dont believe me, have your staff listen and watch this video from youtube.

Eric Schwartz puts to music what the majority of the American public now feels.

Please, Congressman, get with the program. There is no reason to keep the dictator in office one second longer. The Constitution and our democracy hang in the balance while we wait for Congress to act. Do it.

Monday, January 29, 2007

The Human Stupidity Quotient Continues to Skyrocket

And its apogee is nowhere in sight.

I can't freaking believe this....THIRTEEN PERCENT of the American public (that would be forty million people) have never heard of global warming! Ninety one percent of the world's population views global warming as at least a serious threat, but here in the "homeland" 40 million people have never heard of it.

This cant be attributed to watchers of Faux "News" because if they watched Faux they would have been told that global warming is a hoax. At least they would have HEARD of global warming . This statistic, however, defies explanation.

Where have these people been? Are they all living in that undisclosed location with President-of-Vice Dick (Permanent Snarl) Cheney? Do they not read ANYTHING? Are these the NASCAR lovers who can tell you which tire Dale Earnhardt blew out in the fifth race at Talladega in 1997, but cant name their member of Congress? Maybe these 40 million people are "Christians". That explains it. "God" and his shadow fairy tale "Jesus" will take care of everything so why worry about a concept like global warming?

This is even more evidence of how badly thinking people need to abandon this country and move where intelligence is the norm. France fits that bill. And so does Spain. And, don't forget "Oh, Canada." Maybe we should all congregate in liberal-thinking Vermont and then declare our independence from the United States. Cant you just imagine Senator Patrick Leahy riding on horseback over the Green Mountains yelling "One if by land. Two if by sea"? Leave this cerebral junk pile and move where intelligence matters. It doesn't here any more.

The base of my palm and my forehead are both battered to a bloody pulp right now. Maybe a drink will make things better?

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Senator Warner Has a Change of Heart

Dear Senator Warner

Just about a week ago I wrote you to voice my vehement opposition to what appeared to be your support of president Bush's proposal to "surge" troops in Iraq. A quote you made just after the president's speech made it clear that you supported that foolhardy effort, and I let my feelings be known to you.

Then, just yesterday, this story was posted on the net

regarding your discussions with Gwen Ifill at PBS.

I'm writing now to commend you for this change of heart on your part. Although I think your views on the surge are still not forceful enough, I much prefer this reasoned approach to keeping American kids out of harms way to what previously appeared to be your tacit approval of a policy that continues to cost us $7 billion a month.

The only "return" we are getting on that $7 billion each month is the nightly flights back to Dover Air Force Base, Delaware, where the coffins of recently sacrificed American kids are returned for burial.

I want to think that it was my letter to you that helped you change your mind on the surge. I know that it wasn't. However for whatever reason you are now viewing the surge (and maybe the president also?) in this new light, I highly commend you.

Please keep thinking of ways to get us out of this costly, barbaric quaqmire in Iraq. Sending 21,000 more American kids or even 21 more American kids to the killing fields will not change things one iota. Diplomacy will, and I hope to read soon how you are leading the way with Jim Webb to find a diplomatic solution to Bush's folly in Iraq.

Thanks again, and have a nice weekend.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

The Chimp at 28 Percent

More encouraging news indicating that the American public is finally waking up to the disaster living illegally in the White House

The Chimp's approval rating is down to 28 percent. Well within striking range of Nixon's lowest approval rating before he resigned office in disgrace.

Its encouraging to see that the Chimps numbers are in the 20s. With 32 percent of the American public identifying themselves as a Repugnican, this means that his base is eroding nicely. Keep it up. Be a good uniter and unite everyone against you Dumbya. Go for it. Soon not only will Barney and Laura be your sounding board, they will be the only people left who approve of you.

There is one bit of concern that comes from this poll and its results.

I'm concerned that some of these 28 percent have already passed their idiot gene on through the gene pool. This is one area where abstinence should be encouraged and codified in law. Call it the "Stupid Is as Stupid Does Elimination Act of 2007" that requires all known or suspected Repugnicans to refrain from having sex (since they push it on others I"m sure they will climb on this bandwagon immediately). This may be the only plausible way of keeping the idiot gene from moving further into the basic structure of human society.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

January 20 in History

Twenty-eight years ago today (wow its been that long?) my now ex wife and and I along with a 2 year old daughter and a 5 year old Chesapeake Bay Retriever moved from Hudson Wisconsin to Jamestown North Dakota where I was the nongame bird research ornithologist at the Northern Prairie Wildlife Research Center for the next 6 years. The temperature was rather brisk in Hudson as we trundled out to Interstate 94 to begin the trek north. I drove a gas-guzzling U-Haul truck while Ruth brought up the rear in our Escort wagon. Seven hours later we pulled into Jamestown where the high temperature that day had climbed to a balmy -27 degrees F. A rather "typical" winter day in No Dak in those days.

We crashed at the Ramada Inn (later to become Dakota Inn and now the Quality Inn) and took up residence for 11 days until we could move into our house. That first night we took Jennifer with us to the bar before dinner where we were thrown out of the bar because Jenny was under 21! Certainly wasn't Wisconsin any more. For the next 11 days Chester took great pride in standing by the door, raising the hair on his back, baring his teeth and growling a hellacious growl any time someone walked by the door. Afterall, he had "his" baby to protect.

Twenty years ago this morning I woke up at Mark Oberle's house in Atlanta having crashed there the last two nights with a bad case of the flu. Mark and Mardie were in the Galapagos so I was fending for myself. I left Mark's house in mid morning and began the trek northwest toward Grand Island Nebraska. Thankfully John Spinks had saved me from a life of the Patuxent Wildlife Research Center and asked me to come to Grand Island to work on water issues on the Platte River. John Sidle came out at the same time, saving him from the Regional Office in Minneapolis.

After stopping in north Atlanta at the house of someone later to become a huge mistake I made it as far as Carbondale Illinos where I crashed for the night. Enroute to Illinois, as I entered Chattanooga Tennessee, I pulled to the side of the freeway to get out and take one farewell look at Georgia. Instead of saying goodbye I came up with the idea for a bumpersticker that should be given to all "yankees" who transplant to Georgia. The sticker would read "Happiness Is Georgia In My Rear-view Mirror."

Its funny how when we were kids the concept of 20 years (and even worse 28 years) seemed like an eternity. Now, 20 years feels and seems like yesterday.

Two Long Years to Freedom - January 20, 2009

Just think. Two years from today the biggest mistake every foisted on the American Constitution will no longer be a resident of the White House

Just two very long years from today the most stupid son of a bitch ever to accomplish the mission of landing on the deck of an aircraft carrier moored 500 meters off the shore of San Diego will step down. The moment the first President since Bill Clinton is sworn in, I hope security forces of the United Nations grab Bush and Cheney, slap the shit out of them, put them in handcuffs and leg irons and squirrel them away to the Hague Netherlands where they can begin their trials for crimes against humanity. I hope that justice is served quickly, mercilessly and painfully, just like how Bush has meted out "justice" to detainees at Guantanamo Bay.

In resident Bush's place we will see President Al Gore standing tall, raising his right hand and swearing to actually uphold the Constitution instead of calling it, as Bush did "just a god damned piece of paper." Standing next to Al will be Vice President Wesley Clark, whose first job will be to fly to Iraqnam and negotiate a peaceful settlement to the debacle that Bush and Cheney created to steal more oil.

Leaving the steps of the Capitol to begin the traditional journey to the White House, President Gore wont have to worry about not getting out of the car to walk. People like me will not be standing along the verge of Constitution Avenue throwing eggs like we did on January 20, 2001 when the moron was inaugurated illegally. President Al will hold his head high and listen to the thunderous applause of hundreds of thousands of us, all breathing a sigh of relief that the eight long years of horror are over.

That evening at the Inaugural Ball, Al will have invited the two most important singers in the world to entertain the crowd. Jimmy Buffett will take the stage first where he'll dedicate his first song, the Stones classic "You Cant Always Get What You Want" to the newly departed former resident of the White House. After a few classic Buffett songs (Fins, Margaritaville, Floridays, Migration, Why Dont We Get Drunk and Screw), Al will turn the microphone over to the musical group that had the most influence in waking up this country to the excesses of the bush administration. Yup, the Dixie Chicks will take the stage and the crowd will go wild. Their first song will be an adaptation of their 2000 classic "Goodbye Earl" only the word "Earl" will have been replaced by "George." I can already imagine the smile on Natalie's face when she asks George how he likes to be thrown in the trunk.

When Goodbye George is over, the Chicks will play a variation of their song "Not Ready to Make Nice" that will now contain the phrase "Now, I'm ready to make nice" This will bring a smile to President Gore's face as he pats Tipper on the butt and slams down another pint of Land Shark Lager donated to the party by Jimmy Buffett's brewery.

The party will go on all night. Copious amounts of Land Shark Lager will be consumed. Common people like you and me will be welcome. We wont have to sign a loyalty pledge to get near our President like the Repugnicans have to do when their resident is in town. Social Justice will be the norm. The earth wont be under attack any longer (well until the next Repugnican is sitting in the White House). We'll have universal health care. Presciription drugs wont cost us an arm and a leg. Al Franken will be Secretary of State where he'll do wonders making the world laugh and realizing that the United States is no longer the world's bully. Rachel Maddow will be packing her bags to move into her new position as US Ambassador to the United Nations. Ed Schultz, the self-admitted "Meat-eating, gun-toting liberal" radio show host from Fargo will be taking over as Secretary of the Interior. Other smart choices for Cabinet positions will be made and the world once again, will be at peace. Just like it was when Bill was President.

And it all begins just two long years from today.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

John Warner Supports Bush's Surge

I'm lucky to have Congressman Jim Moran (D) and Senator Jim Webb (D) representing me. And, on occasion I'm also proud of Senator John Warner. However Warner is on record supporting the foolish escalation of troop numbers in Iraqnam and that has to be changed.

I sent him the following letter today. Check to see if your Congressman or Senator(s) likewise support Bush's escalation. If so, send a variation of my letter to them and hopefully straighten out their midguided thinking.

Dear Senator Warner

I am deeply disappointed to learn of your continued support for the ill-advised "surge" of American troops to be killed for Bush's lies in Iraq.

In response to Bush's "surge" speech the other night you said:

“I found the speech to be credible and sincere. And it does lay down a plan that reflects a lot of study by the executive branch, a lot of advice and opinion that the president took into consideration.”

Good God, Senator, you can call Bush "sincere" and "credible" even after he has repeatedly lied to you, me and the fencepost about Iraq?? Is it "credible" to be told about a grave threat from weapons of mass destruction (that Bush's dad sold to Saddam) when they didn't exist any longer? Is it "sincere" to not take action on a report that Osama bin Laden was determined to attack inside the United States (Presidential Daily Briefing, August 6, 2001). How can you, a man of education and refinement, find it inside you to support for one second Bush's plans to get more Americans killed to mollify his ego?

How on earth can you sleep at night?

I am not only asking you but begging you to reverse your position on this hideous waste of human life, natural resources and taxpayer dollars. Its time that Bush's folly in Iraq be brought to a much-deserved close. I ask that you change your view and oppose this mistake that grows like a cancer more and more each day.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

A Letter to the Decider

Rather than emailing the Chimp, I sent him the following letter (with enclosure) this evening via snail mail. I should have used larger font so he could absorb some of the tougher words. I'll remember to do that next time.

January 17, 2007

George Bush, resident
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington DC 20500

Dear resident Bush

I can imagine with the entire world hating you because of your bungled failure in Iraqnam you must find it difficult to get in a chuckle or two each day. After your disastrous showings on the PBS News Hour and on 60 Minutes even Barney is lifting his Scottish leg and pissing on your foot. Its got to be tough being the decider, huh, Dumbya?

Well, you moron, I’m providing you with a little pick-me-up in the form of the enclosed bumper sticker. There are some big words on here, including one tri-syllabic word called “Impeachment” so you will probably need help from Laura to understand its meaning. Maybe if you read it really slowly you might understand what it says? Lets try. K? The bumper sticker says Impeachment - Its Not Just For Blowjobs Anymore.” That’s referring to you, Dumbya. Lying to the world about non-existent weapons of mass destruction in Iraqnam is more of a Constitutionally-proscribed “high crimes and misdemeanor” than is a sloppy blowjob under the oval office desk.

I would love it if you would have one of your GS-15 flunkies put this bumper sticker on the back of your black limo so you can spread the word about your upcoming impeachment, trial, and removal from office just like I am doing with the same bumper sticker on my car. In case you like this bumper sticker as much as I do, you can have Laura, or Barney, go to this website to order more:

Maybe being the down home beer drinking kind of guy you are, Dumbya, you might want to pass these bumper stickers out to visitors on the daily White House tours? Or how about giving them to your cabinet members? Too bad Bucky Norton isn’t still around so you could watch her gnaw on one for you. You might also want to consider putting one of these bumper stickers next to the door of Helicopter 1 and Air Force 1 so each time you slither out of town you are reminded about your high crimes and your impending trail in the Senate. Are you having Tony Snow or someone work on your resignation speech yet? I’ll resend the one I wrote for you in June 2001 if you promise to use it before your trial. It’s the ‘Merikun thing to do, isn’t it, decider guy?

And, Dumbya, what do you think of the stamp I used to mail this letter and bumper sticker? Two birds obviously kissing each other. Word from the Postal Service is that they birds are gay. I thought you would appreciate that extra touch.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Email to Condi Rice

This was just sent to Secretary Incisor through the State Department website. I'm sure that Condi will be getting back to me this evening if not sooner.

Dear Secretary Fang Rice

Condi...I didn't see your overdeveloped incisors flaring too much during the hearing today before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee. Must have been a big surprise for you to hear members of your own hideous political party calling you and the chimp a fucking liar.

In case you were on acid during the hearing and didnt catch what the senators said, I'm providing a link to the story from

You know, Condi, for the longest time you (and your incisors) were the only person on earth I knew of who could look someone in the face while you sat there with a huge steaming clump of dog shit on your nose and tell everyone convincingly "there's no huge steaming clump of dog shit on my nose" and believe it yourself. However, Fang, I think those days are now over with the Democrats finally in control of your echo chamber on Capitol Hill, and with Repugnicans who smell their certain defeat at the polls in 2008 realizing that getting off Bush's sinking ship now is a wise move.

Its unfortunate that, given your academic background, you are obviously totally incapable of independent thought. How much longer are you going to be a token intellectual for the Bush Abomination as it sinks the United States and our formerly good name, further into the abyss of world opinion?

You probably dont care because when you are out of a job on January 20, 2009 at 12:01 pm you'll likely get a job working for the incisor-reduction industry lobbyists on K Street.

Nice try today, Fang. Unfortunately you and Bush and the rest of the steaming pile of dog shit in the Bush Administration have lied once too often and not listened to the story of the boy who cried wolf enough times. You shit in your own mess kit. Now put those incisors to work cleaning up your mess.

Here's hoping for a quick painless American departure from the debacle that you and the neocon's have created in Iraqnam.

Craig Faanes

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Why Do Democrats Hate Our Troops?

If Democrats were really 'merikun like Bush and the conservatives we'd be clammoring to send more of them to Iraq to be killed for lies.

So by opposing the escalation of troops that pea-brain is to announce this evening, we must hate troops because we want to deny them the opportunity to be killed for a lie. That has to be it.

Sunday, January 7, 2007

Let The Investigations Begin!!

What I liked about this program started in the very beginning with Waxman sitting there with an ear-to-ear grin. Now I can barely wait. If only Waxman had the absolute authority to remove testicles with rusty razor blades, and tack them to the hearing room wall behind him. Those however are the things of fantasies for the Bush/Cheney war crimes trials.

Memo to Joe Scarborough at MSNBC

Dear Joe

As a long-time liberal I have to commend you for having the guts and balls to say what you say on your show, and especially your dressing down of the fanatic bully Bill O'Reilly

As your comments indicate, the kind of conservative you are is the old conservative. The kind my mom was when she was a honcho in the R party in Wisconsin. It can also be argued that the kind of conservative you are is the way we "liberals" have become. That may be a bitter pill to swallow but its the truth.

Please keep hammering Faux "News" and others who deserve to be called out on the carpet. I"m not sure if its Dan Abrams' influence or what but there has been one hell of an epiphany in you and your views in the last year.

If you continue to feel out of place in the Republican Party and the conservative mantra, and want to come over to where divergent points of view are not only commonplace but almost endemic, switch to our side. We'll let byegones be byegones from the get go.

Cindy Sheehan Is Now No Different Than the Audubon Society

Long ago and far away I used to believe in the National Audubon Society. They were the world's best group for taking on development interests that would harm the habitat of birds. Then to appeal to more people they started to fragment their focus. At first Audubon was the bird group that hated a water project in North Dakota (and brought it to its knees only to "save" it in the House of Representatives 2 years later). But they stopped that focus and got into population control, global warming, and whatever issue was a hot topic that day.

Now we see Cindy Sheehan being a clone of Audubon.

She was great and effective when she started Camp Casey down the road from the Chimp's purchased-by-others ranch in Crawford. She made a great leap forward in the then-fledgling anti-war movement. You cant laud her enough for that. But Cindy lost focus, and probably in the glow of all her media attention.

Soon she was all over the place. Flying to Europe for peace rallies. Endorsing Hugo Chavez in Venezuela because he was opposed to the Chimp. Getting into issues for which she had no background. And now flying to Cuba to speak out against the atrocities at GITMO.

Granted, theres more than ample reason to be pissed about GITMO (hope she sees Oriente Warbler and Cuban Gnatcatcher while there) but what does GITMO have to do with the "grieving mom" persona she originally used to get everyone else's attention? Was her son killed at GITMO? I don't think so.

It appears now that Cindy is no different than any other attention grabber out there. Its too bad also. She had alot of people on her side and for her cause. Then she went Hollywood.

The Four "I's" of 2007





Saturday, January 6, 2007

Senator John Warner - Putting His Money Where His Mouth Was

Dear Senator Warner

Three months ago today, on October 6, 2006, you said the following in an interview with CBS News

"In two or three months, if this thing hasn't come to fruition and if this level of violence is not under control … I think it's the responsibility of our government, internally, to determine: Is there a change of course that we should take? And I wouldn't take off the table any option at this time," Warner told reporters on Thursday, reports CBS News Capitol Hill reporter John Nolen

It is now not only two months later but three. Are you going to stick to your word? Can we the people of Virginia expect you to come out opposing Bush's ridiculous proposal to send more American kids to their deaths in the killing fields of Iraq? Or were your words simply tough-talk leading up to the November 7 election?

I should hope by now that the Republican party has learned the lesson of November 7. We the people are fed up with Bush and the direction he is leading the country. Its now up to you and the members of Congress, and especially the Republican members of Congress who supported his every move without a question, to come down hard on the side of reason and reality.

The question now becomes: Does Senator Warner have the guts to put his money where his mouth was three months ago today?

Friday, January 5, 2007


Here is the perfect word to use in describing the Chimp and all of his minions and his cabinet.


Here's the definition. Perfect??

pseu·dol·o·gy /suˈdɒlədʒi/ –noun Facetious. lying considered as an art.


[Origin: 1570–80; < Gk pseudología falsehood; see pseudo-, -logy; or E recoinage from same elements]

—Related forms
pseu·do·log·i·cal /ˌsudlˈɒdʒɪkəl/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[sood-l-oj-i-kuhl] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation, adjective
pseu·dol·o·gist, noun Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

Security "Threats"

This is a recent email to the Reichsmarshall in charge of the Department of Homeland Surveillance. I'm still waiting for a reply.

Dear Turist Hunters at the Department of Duetschland Surveillance.....

Because of the new security scare / hype that the Repugnicans are trying to milk for political gain, the Department of Duetschland Surveillance has once again gone overboard on its restrictions. Come on people, get real. When is the last time someone used make up in a turism plot?? But, undaunted, and with your party so low in the polls, you reverted to the Karl Rove playbook and came up with new and interesting ways to scare the public into believing its "safe."

Probably the most foolish requirement you have imposed is the one making mothers test their bottled mothers milk before the person can get on a plane. If you had one scintilla of intelligence you would know that immediately upon touching human lips to the milk its contaminated and unfit for the baby to consume. That leaves only one solution for the mother - she has to breast feed the baby.

Given that reality, have you Rhodes Scholars thought that you will now need to test the breasts of lactating mothers to make sure they aren't hiding some turist contraption in their breasts? Could be one hell of a loophole that the turists have there - you need to get Mike Cherthoff and an entire room full of SES folks on this issue FAST.

However, before you burn up too many brain cells, I would like to offer a simple solution. You could hire me to personally examine the mammary glands of all lactating mothers trying to make their way through a security screening area. I'll do it for my country (mom, home and apple pie also). If you are willing to let me express my patriotism by examining the breasts of lactating mothers as a way to defend freedom, I'll do the job and wont even require payment. Consider it my contribution to stamping out turism in 'merika.
I'll even do the job 24/7 with no potty breaks.

So, if Mike and the SES crowd think this is a great way to circumvent the boob/nipple loophole for fighting turism I can begin work tomorrow morning. Just pick the airport and I'll be there. I wont even put on those stupid rubber gloves that your gestapo agents use at the metal detectors. Nope...i'll feel them up au natural. K? Call me on my cell and let me know or email me at the address above.

Yours in fighting turists there so we dont have to fight them here.

Craig Faanes

Obfuscation of the Truth 101

Look at these two confusing employment stories from Yahoo News

In the first we are told that job growth was "surprisingly strong" in December 2006

In this story we are told that the jobless rate "inched up" in December 2006

I'm not an economist but how can that be? You wouldn't suppose that the Bush Administration is lying to us about the jobless issue? Especially with stories only 1 day apart.

However if you look at recent months you'll find the same pattern of lies. One day the Labor Department tells us that the jobless rate increased and the next day (or 2 days later) we are told that the economy is producing jobs at an unprecedented rate. Seems like not only wool being pulled over eyes but huge quantities of bullshit also.

Democratic Party Treads Close to "Treason"

Here's an email I sent to a myopic ass who had penned an opinion article with a similar title. My opinion is that this jerk along with William Kristol, Paul Wolfowitz, and the rest of the neocon cabal should be made personally liable for the hardship and expense their idiotic dreams have caused the United States.

Dear Alan

Now that Bush has lost his neocon war in Iraqnam and more than 3,000 American kids have died for his lies, and more than $400 BILLION has been wasted to find non-existent weapons of mass destruction, and the word of the United States is now folly all over the world, do you still think that the Democrats are treading close to treason as you did in this 2004 article?

Or do you think it was a matter of democracy at work.

If you want to talk about treason, look at your alleged "president" and how he has lied to Congress and to the American public about a non-existent threat. He has caused heartache and suffering throughout the world all for no reason other than he is deficient in testosterone and needed to act like a tough guy.

The treasonous people are you and your fellow neocon wingnuts who supported Bush and egged him on and in the process defiled the name of the United States in the world community.

Way to go, numbnuts. We dont need your help anymore. Perhaps you and William Kristol and Wolfowitz and the rest of the University of Chicago wingnut group should take a 5 year vacation trip to Inner Mongolia. You shouldn't fuck up too much there.

Before Jumping On the Ethanol Bandwagon

Read this paper before getting too involved in the hype about ethanol.

When I lived in Nebraska 15 years ago it was generally stated then that it took the equivalent of 1.5 gallons of energy to produce 1.0 gallons of ethanol. In other words it took more energy to make ethanol than if we had just used gasoline.

Of course using ethanol helps the "poor farmer" (the last poor farmer I know of fell of his yacht in Antigua harbour in 1988 and was later seen mailing his absentee ballot for an entire slate of Repugnicans from his villa overlooking the harbour in Roseau, Dominica) and its use makes people think they are doing something for the earth. Nebraska has a $1 billion corn industry. Unfortunately for us, $600 million of that comes from federal subsidies and target payments. Obviously we're harming the earth by using ethanol not helping her.

One other thing that needs to be taken into account with the upcoming surge in corn production to make ethanol is the stress that will be put on the land. Alot of the prairie region is no longer black dirt because of set aside programs such as the Conservation Reserve Program. With increased prices for corn there will a logical push to plow up all of that CRP land and convert it back to corn production. Watch soil storms return to the prairies when our greed surpasses whats best for the earth, and full scale corn production is the norm again.

Hal Kantrud and I once coined a couple phrases to describe agricultural land use on the prairies. "Butzed" land was land that had been plowed from fence row to fence row in response to an incentive provided by former Agricultural Secretary Earl Butz. "Glinzed" land was land where the fences had been totally removed and all the land was laid bare. Glinzed land was named to recognize the contributions to soil erosion by Stutsman County North Dakota farmer Arvel Glinz who treated the land with no respect. (He was also named "Duck Conservationsit of the Year" by the Stutsman County chapter of Ducks Unlimited. Arvel had probably drained 10 times the amount of wetlands of everyone else in the group to make way for wheat production. But, Arvel paid $5,000 each year for 3 years to buy a shotgun auctioned off as a fund raiser by DU, so that made him a duck conservationist). Arvel Glinz is why I will never support Ducks Unlimited.

I fear that growing corn for ethanol production will lead to "hosed" land - a concept I dont want to deal with.

Read on.

Who Would Jesus Defame?

Here's an interesting issue for the Repugnicans to consider

The Shrub is going to nominate an Iraqi Muslim to be United States Ambassador to the United Nations

This comes on the heels of myopic, bigoted Virginia Congressman Virgil Goode going ape shit over a Muslim from Minnesota being sworn into the Congress by holding his hand on a Koran.

This makes me wonder if tough guy Goode is going to now attack Bush for allowing more Muslims into the country, like his new Ambassador to the United Nations?

This also brings up another interesting subject. What parents, in the mid 20th Century, would name their kid "Virgil" for Christ's sake?

Bush Bumper Stickers

This list of recently observed anti-Chimp bumper stickers, while not exhaustive, will certainly give you several minutes of uninterupted laughter as you sit there thinking, "damn,why didn't I think of that one." Enjoy!

01/20/09: End of an Error

That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway

Let's Fix Democracy in This Country First

If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran

Bush. Like a Rock. Only Dumber.

If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President

Of Course It Hurts: You're Getting Screwed by an Elephant

Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?

George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight

Impeachment: It's Not Just for Blowjobs Anymore

America: One Nation, Under Surveillance

They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell It

Whose God Do You Kill For?

Jail to the Chief

No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade Iraq?

Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap

We Need a President Who's Fluent In At Least One Language

We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them

Is It Vietnam Yet?

Bush Doesn't Care About White People, Either

Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Handbasket?

You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.

Impeach Cheney First

When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46

Pray For Impeachment

The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century

What Part of "Bush Lied" Don't You Understand?

One Nation Under Clod

2004: Embarrassed
2005: Horrified
2006: Terrified

Bush Never Exhaled

At Least Nixon Resigned

Thursday, January 4, 2007

Words to Banish

If you go to the website for Lake Superior State University in SaultSte. Marie, Michigan

you can review a list of words that have been proposed for banishment in 2007, along with the reasoning behind the proposed banishment. On the same page you can also propose words you think should be banished.

I just submitted the following.

Exit signs for the CIA complex off the George Washington Parkway in Fairfax County Virginia say "George Bush Center for Intelligence" Given the last six years of his imperial reign, I think its obvious that "George Bush" and "intelligence" is a classic oxymoron that nobody should have to utter.

Right Wing Whacko Proposes Offing Members of Congress

I just submitted the following to the Federal Bureau of Investigation through their tips website

Dear FBI

Please review the rantings of this right wing whack job who is proposing the assassination of Members of Congress who dont vote on immigration bills the way he "thinks" they should vote.

This takes the First Amendment far beyond where Free Speech was intended to go. These are terroristic threats. Put the Patriot Act to work - or is that just reserved for anti-war demonstrators?

You can submit a complaint about this jackal at the same site. Go here

Can you imagine the howling from Ann Coulter and the rest of the Right Wing Death Cult if Al Franken or Stephanie Miller had proposed this?

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Stupidity Texas Style


After reading the following story from the Associated Press, I sort of formed an impression of you in my mind. Please tell me how close to 100 I scored.

1 - You vote Repugnican
2- You are a "family values" "christian"
3 - At the end of every service you attend you say "god loves you" to people around you.
4 - You have never traveled outside of the United States except, perhaps, on a drinking binge in Cancun.
5 - You think Rush Limbaugh is a reporter.
6 - You think that "liberals" want to turn you into a homo.
7 - You called black people "niggers" when you were a kid and probably still do so today.
8 - You gained great pleasure from torturing animals when you were a kid. You probably followed George Bush's lead and pulled the heads off frogs to see how they reacted.
9 - Your IQ is somewhere betwen that of a gnat and a tsetse fly.
10 - You think George Bush is an "honorable" man.
11 - You think that killing 3,000 Americans because of lies about non-existent weapons of mass destruction was ok because we're putting those "ragheads" in their place.
12 - You still occasionally wet your bed.
13 - You think global warming is a plot by "liberals" to take away your land.
14 - You think all the world hates America because Bill Clinton got a blow job.
15 - You have very few friends, and cant remember the last time someone came by your house just to say hello.

Did I go at least 13 for 15, Craig?

I'd be shocked if I didn't. Especially after reading about what a "compassionate" conservative you are in this story.

It is my sincerest wish that you some day have a heart attack and the doctor attending you is a Muslim and he remembers you from this incident and decides to chill his orange juice a bit more before he drinks it rather than taking care of your sorry ass lying on the gurney in front of him. Seems fair, doesn't it? Afterall, its just "Texas-Spirited" isn't it?

December 31st, 2006 1:36 pm

Man races pigs near planned mosque site

Associated Press

KATY, Texas - A man unhappy with an Islamic association's plans to build a mosque next to his property has staged pig races as a protest during afternoon prayers.
Craig Baker, 46, sold merchandise and grilled sausages Friday for about 100 people who showed up in heavy rain. He insisted he wasn't trying to offend anyone with the pigs, which are forbidden from the Muslim diet.

"I am just defending my rights and my property," Baker said. "They totally disrespected me and my family."

Muslims don't hate pigs, they just don't eat them, said engineer Kamel Fotouh, president of the 500-member Katy Islamic Association in this Houston suburb.

"I don't care if he races, roasts or slaughters pigs," said Yousef Allam, a spokesman for the group.

The dispute began when the association asked Baker to remove his cattle from its newly bought land. The association plans to build a mosque, community center, athletic facilities and a school.

Baker agreed to move his cattle but thought the Muslims also wanted him off the land his family has lived on for more than 100 years.

Earlier this month, Baker conceded that the Muslims probably aren't after his land, but he said he had to go through with the pig races because "I would be like a total idiot if I didn't. I'd be the laughingstock now because I've gone too far."

All the same, Baker plans to continue the weekly pig races until interest dwindles.
The association never meant to imply it wanted Baker to move, Allam said.

"If we somehow communicated that to him, then we apologize," he said.

Resident Susan Canavespe said the pig racing wasn't mean-spirited — "It's just Texas-spirited."

Would Someone Please Volunteer?

The Conservative-Biased Media Strike Again

Check out this story about millionaire loser Britney Spears

Pay particular attention to this comment near the end of the story:

"In a statement on her Web site posted earlier this month, Spears noted that in recent nights out — one in which she flashed her apparent lack of underwear to the paparazzi "

APPARENT lack of underwear?? J H Christ. Scroll down through these pictures and tell me if you would use the word "apparent" to describe her hairless muff (is that an oxymoron?) hanging out.

Bill Clinton gets a blow job from a blue-dressed intern and it winds up being described in graphic terms to a Federal grand jury. Britney flashes her gash (as the Aussies would say) and the conservative-biased media calls it "apparent"?

Give me a break.

A Democrats Version of the "Rapture"

If you're depressed and feeling low because of the political situation in the United States today, get a boost and put a smile on your face by checking out this very important clock.

To paraphrase Jimmy Buffett's great new song Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On, "According to my watch the "rapture" will occur in 748 days" on January 20, 2009, when Al Gore and Wes Clark are sworn in as the first adults to lead the country since Bill Clinton and when the Smirking Chimp and Deadeye Dick are no longer a national embarassment.

If you assume an average of 72 beats per minute, that means that our hearts have to beat only 1,292,544 more times until the idiot is cast off to be devoured by the wolves of history. (Some of us with atrial fibrilation may toss in a few extra beats now and then - but on average).

Only 748 more bagel breakfasts and he's outta there. Only 748 more salads for lunch and we will be free. Only 748 more hours in the gym working out while checking out the 20 year old hard bodies and remembering the good old days. Only 748 more beers with dinner and the cocaine cowboy will be on his way to the Hague to face the World Court in his war crimes trials. With luck, stand up comedian Donny Rumsfeld will be placed in the cargo hold of the same jet that the Chimp and Deadeye are in and will face "justice" for the first time also.

The "christians" believe that the "rapture" (which has no basis in the grim fairy tales called "the bible") will occur when a long-haired hippie type guy who was last seen in someone's hallucination hanging from a cross, will return to earth (from WHERE??) to set the believers free.

For Democrats, our rapture will be seeing the Chimp and Deadeye in chains, their legs shackled together, as they duck walk into a Dutch court room.

And it all begins just 748 days from today.

Monday, January 1, 2007

In Case You've Forgotten

Whats that old saying about a picture being worth 1,000 words?

These 2,000 word pictures sum up everything there is to know about the Bush "presidency." And to think he has the unmitigated gall to want to suck $500 million out of people who know him to build a "presidential" library at Southern Methodist University. By definition a "library" implies a place where people who read can gather. What does a library have to do with Bush?

A Fairy Tale to Return in 2007?

Check out this story from yahoo news...

Pay attention to the part where it states that 25 percent of Americans expect a fairy tale with allegedly long flowing brown hair to "return" in 2007.

One in every four people you see in an airport believe that the star of a book written by umpteen different authors and now in its 16th edition (the King James version at least) is going to slide back to earth (from WHERE?) on the tail of a comet or something and bring peace and tranquility to the world (but not before killing his "believers" so they can ascend to outer space (I guess) with him! We are doomed.

At the moment, I'm reading another Mormon book - A Gathering of Saints by Robert Lindsey. Mormonism is such a tremendous example of abject human stupidity and the eager willingness to be massively bamboozled. The record is not only easily available, it is well studied, clear and totally unequivocal.

Mormonism is a total fraud, made up out of whole cloth by a convicted felon, a demonstrated liar, conman, philandering pedophile and all around scumbag, one Joseph Smith. Yet, millions of idiots buy this shit hook, line and sinker. Talk about a colossal forehead slapper!

This book, about murder and fraud committed by Mormons, underscores the need to give Mormons a wide berth. Utah is the fraud capital of the United States. Mormons think they have a divine right to be rich, so when it doesn't happen, they tend to "help things along" with a little lying, cheating and stealing. Totally mind blowing.

Bush and the Saudi's

Have you read these before? 5 year old Boston Herald articles about the tight, corrupt relationship between US Gov and Saudi royal fam. and most especially, the relationship between the BushCo family dynasty and their buddies, the Saudi royal pedophile criminal syndicate.

What is very clear is that Poppy Bush, just like his grand pap helped the Nazis in WWII, has eagerly helped the Saudis as they quietly funded 9/11 and murdered Americans. The BushCo crime syndicate makes the mafia look like a pre school class.

As I recall, the Boston Herald was the only, or one of the few, newspapers that try to do their job. I think it is the only paper that reported back around 2000 about the chimp's Texas Air National Guard malfeasance and Laura having committed manslaughter. An effort that amounted to pissing in the wind as the pea brained Amurikin public expressed its pseudomoralistic outrage over Clintons' blow job.

It's a great 2 part article, 5 years old but still relevant today.