If you're depressed and feeling low because of the political situation in the United States today, get a boost and put a smile on your face by checking out this very important clock.
http://nationalnightmare.com/
To paraphrase Jimmy Buffett's great new song Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On, "According to my watch the "rapture" will occur in 748 days" on January 20, 2009, when Al Gore and Wes Clark are sworn in as the first adults to lead the country since Bill Clinton and when the Smirking Chimp and Deadeye Dick are no longer a national embarassment.
If you assume an average of 72 beats per minute, that means that our hearts have to beat only 1,292,544 more times until the idiot is cast off to be devoured by the wolves of history. (Some of us with atrial fibrilation may toss in a few extra beats now and then - but on average).
Only 748 more bagel breakfasts and he's outta there. Only 748 more salads for lunch and we will be free. Only 748 more hours in the gym working out while checking out the 20 year old hard bodies and remembering the good old days. Only 748 more beers with dinner and the cocaine cowboy will be on his way to the Hague to face the World Court in his war crimes trials. With luck, stand up comedian Donny Rumsfeld will be placed in the cargo hold of the same jet that the Chimp and Deadeye are in and will face "justice" for the first time also.
The "christians" believe that the "rapture" (which has no basis in the grim fairy tales called "the bible") will occur when a long-haired hippie type guy who was last seen in someone's hallucination hanging from a cross, will return to earth (from WHERE??) to set the believers free.
For Democrats, our rapture will be seeing the Chimp and Deadeye in chains, their legs shackled together, as they duck walk into a Dutch court room.
And it all begins just 748 days from today.
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