Stupidity Texas Style

Craig

After reading the following story from the Associated Press, I sort of formed an impression of you in my mind. Please tell me how close to 100 I scored.

1 - You vote Repugnican
2- You are a "family values" "christian"
3 - At the end of every service you attend you say "god loves you" to people around you.
4 - You have never traveled outside of the United States except, perhaps, on a drinking binge in Cancun.
5 - You think Rush Limbaugh is a reporter.
6 - You think that "liberals" want to turn you into a homo.
7 - You called black people "niggers" when you were a kid and probably still do so today.
8 - You gained great pleasure from torturing animals when you were a kid. You probably followed George Bush's lead and pulled the heads off frogs to see how they reacted.
9 - Your IQ is somewhere betwen that of a gnat and a tsetse fly.
10 - You think George Bush is an "honorable" man.
11 - You think that killing 3,000 Americans because of lies about non-existent weapons of mass destruction was ok because we're putting those "ragheads" in their place.
12 - You still occasionally wet your bed.
13 - You think global warming is a plot by "liberals" to take away your land.
14 - You think all the world hates America because Bill Clinton got a blow job.
15 - You have very few friends, and cant remember the last time someone came by your house just to say hello.

Did I go at least 13 for 15, Craig?

I'd be shocked if I didn't. Especially after reading about what a "compassionate" conservative you are in this story.

It is my sincerest wish that you some day have a heart attack and the doctor attending you is a Muslim and he remembers you from this incident and decides to chill his orange juice a bit more before he drinks it rather than taking care of your sorry ass lying on the gurney in front of him. Seems fair, doesn't it? Afterall, its just "Texas-Spirited" isn't it?



December 31st, 2006 1:36 pm

Man races pigs near planned mosque site

Associated Press

KATY, Texas - A man unhappy with an Islamic association's plans to build a mosque next to his property has staged pig races as a protest during afternoon prayers.
Craig Baker, 46, sold merchandise and grilled sausages Friday for about 100 people who showed up in heavy rain. He insisted he wasn't trying to offend anyone with the pigs, which are forbidden from the Muslim diet.

"I am just defending my rights and my property," Baker said. "They totally disrespected me and my family."

Muslims don't hate pigs, they just don't eat them, said engineer Kamel Fotouh, president of the 500-member Katy Islamic Association in this Houston suburb.

"I don't care if he races, roasts or slaughters pigs," said Yousef Allam, a spokesman for the group.

The dispute began when the association asked Baker to remove his cattle from its newly bought land. The association plans to build a mosque, community center, athletic facilities and a school.

Baker agreed to move his cattle but thought the Muslims also wanted him off the land his family has lived on for more than 100 years.

Earlier this month, Baker conceded that the Muslims probably aren't after his land, but he said he had to go through with the pig races because "I would be like a total idiot if I didn't. I'd be the laughingstock now because I've gone too far."

All the same, Baker plans to continue the weekly pig races until interest dwindles.
The association never meant to imply it wanted Baker to move, Allam said.

"If we somehow communicated that to him, then we apologize," he said.

Resident Susan Canavespe said the pig racing wasn't mean-spirited — "It's just Texas-spirited."