The good news is that doctors exploring vice-resident Dick Cheney's chest to replace his heart pump found a heart. The bad news is they left it in his chest.
Doctors at George Washington University Hospital replaced the defibrillator, a sealed unit that includes a battery. If the device were to sense an abnormal heart rhythm, it would deliver an electronic shock to reset the vice president's heart to a normal beat.
"The device was successfully replaced without complication," said Megan McGinn, the vice president's deputy press secretary.
Of course we all remember how many lies were associated with Uncle Dick shooting the Repignican in the face while quail hunting (I bet that would be a most satisfying feeling). Despite the deputy press secretary saying there were no complications, these bastards lie so frequently and openly we can probably assume from Megan's comments that there were complications. We can hope anyway.
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